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Mailbag: Super Bowl Edition

Dear Eli Manning,
    Well, at least one Eli came out on top.
         -Yale Varsity Football

Dear Super Bowl Sunday,
    Why so many hot wings? Why so many nachos? Why so much beer?
         Upset,
         Super Bowel Monday

Dear Tom Brady,
    You're still awesome.
         Love,
         Tom Brady

Dear Britney Spears,
    We appreciate your offer to perform at the halftime show, but we are looking for somebody who's less past their prime and washed up. We chose Tom Petty.
         Sincerely,
         The Super Bowl Halftime Show Committee

Dear New England Patriots,
    When we said you could be like the '72 Dolphins, we meant you could be like they were in 1972.
         -Sports Illustrated




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