By Ben Orlin '09
A month before he resigned from office, Eliot Spitzer was asked by an old friend if he liked being governor of New York. "I hate it," he answered. "Really?" the friend asked. "Yeah, I'd rather be a high-school teacher."
-Newsweek, March 24, 2008
MR. SPITZER: Okay, class. Welcome back from break. Let's
resume our study of American history with a little quiz on governmental ethics.
STUDENT #1: Aw, Mr. Spitzer, a pop quiz on the first day
back?
STUDENT #2: This sucks.
MR. SPITZER: No whining. You have ten minutes to complete the quiz.
STUDENT #3: Wait a second... did you copy and paste this "quiz" from Wikipedia?
MR. SPITZER: No.
STUDENT #1: Then why is there an "External Links" section at the bottom?
STUDENT #4: You told us we'd get F's if we copied stuff from Wikipedia!
STUDENT #2: Yeah, this is hypocritical!
MR. SPITZER: Quiet down and take the test. I'm flinging a spitball at the next kid who talks.
STUDENT #3: How come you get to fling spitballs when we're not allowed to, according to--eww, gross!
MR. SPITZER: I warned you.
STUDENT #5: Mr. Spitzer, why are you so strict? You need to get laid or something.
MR. SPITZER: I wish. You think I can afford that on a teacher's salary?
MR. SPITZER: No whining. You have ten minutes to complete the quiz.
STUDENT #3: Wait a second... did you copy and paste this "quiz" from Wikipedia?
MR. SPITZER: No.
STUDENT #1: Then why is there an "External Links" section at the bottom?
STUDENT #4: You told us we'd get F's if we copied stuff from Wikipedia!
STUDENT #2: Yeah, this is hypocritical!
MR. SPITZER: Quiet down and take the test. I'm flinging a spitball at the next kid who talks.
STUDENT #3: How come you get to fling spitballs when we're not allowed to, according to--eww, gross!
MR. SPITZER: I warned you.
STUDENT #5: Mr. Spitzer, why are you so strict? You need to get laid or something.
MR. SPITZER: I wish. You think I can afford that on a teacher's salary?
Later...
A FRIEND: So, Eliot, are you happy being a high school history
teacher?
MR. SPITZER: I hate it.
A FRIEND: Really?
MR. SPITZER: At least it beats being the governor of a large, prosperous state.
A FRIEND: Yeah, anything but that.
